All About Women | Women

Last evening was the first of a follow-up coaching session to The Confident Woman workshop. Most of the women returned, and a few new women joined us. It was one of the most enjoyable and fun-filled sessions I have ever facilitated. I know, I say that about all my workshops!

But this one was different, as it was not a workshop but a group coaching session. So thoughts and questions came up and the women were instrumental in tapping into their own inner spirits to discover what their own confidence blocks were and we discussed ways to break through those blocks. Again, we spoke a lot about operating in a spirit of love as opposed to operating in a spirit of fear.

One of the biggest blocks for many women is finding the time and space to get in touch with the inner spirit. Though we say we want to build a relationship with ourselves, we don’t make it a top priority. We need to schedule an appointment with ourselves to take ourselves out on an Artist Date. And we must keep the appointment as we would any other appointment.

What is an Artist Date? Well, I am so glad you asked! In her ground-breaking book The Artist’s Way, Julia Cameron speaks of two ways of tapping into the inner creative or inner spirit: Morning Pages and Artist Dates. Morning pages are just long hand, stream of conscious writing in a journal every morning without censorship or edit.

Then there is my favorite, the Artist Date. Take yourself out on a date, just you and perhaps your journal and just be. I love long bus rides. So I will hop on the bus and ride all the way to the final stop, with no destination in mind. I usually end up in my favorite café where I write about anything that has come up for me. Sometimes, I just go to Central Park and sit near the water and watch the ducks and the swans. Other times, I do a combination of things, all the while carrying my journal to capture any dreams, thoughts, ideas, or just musings.

If you are having a difficult time tapping into your inner spirit – the only way to really know who you are and what you want – then I suggest picking up The Artist’s Way. It is a fabulous read and I believe for any of us to really become confident in our lives, we need to know what and who is inside of us.

Greetings Purposeful Divas, and Dons!

Because my birthday is in one week, I have found myself on the dark side. And when I am in this funky space, I tend towards limiting beliefs and negative self talk. You know the kind: "I should be doing this," or "Why aren't I doing that?" Yes, those gremlins. And yes, I have them too; which is why I can speak about them as an expert. Well, every year, like clockwork, the gremlins visit me for a private birthday celebration. Nasty like demons!

So, I thought I'd write about them -- for a few reasons. To share with you, to get out of my own head, and to journey together to rid ourselves of them. Just in case you are having a private party yourself.

What are beliefs? Beliefs are a set of generalizations we make about others, about the world around us, and about ourselves. They are NOT facts, though we may act as if they were. This is an important point: in the middle of the word 'belief' is the word 'lie.' But because beliefs form our reality, we see them as truth.

So, how do we rid ourselves of those pesky little gremlins called limiting beliefs? The only way to break through limiting beliefs is to choose to do so. Yeah, I know what you're thinking? Is that it? Well, yes. Choice is our most powerful weapon in the universe. And unfortunately, we, especially we women, don't exercise that power very often. That muscle has become atrophied. Time to exercise, ladies!

Once we make the conscious choice to break through the limiting beliefs and the negative self talk, then we need to live in that intention. One effective method for me: I take myself on an artist date. Yes, I am a devout student of the Artist's Way. Going on artist dates not only stirs and sparks creativity, but it gets you out of your head, which is where those gremlins take up residency. Rent in New York City; and they get to live for free!

On my artist date, I love long bus rides. They are tremendously freeing. I just sit back and meditate. I go through my gratitudes and blessings, which are many. I create new ways to empower women, including myself. I journal. My morning pages know all hours of the day. And being on the bus allows me to experience sorrow, joy, and gratitude -- all while being driven to some fabulous and perhaps unknown destination. What I am saying is I can just be. This is my choice, to be and be free!

Until next time, live passionately on purpose!
Coach Carolyn