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As energy costs are rising, the wood stove is coming back into favor with many homeowners. While a wood stove can heat an entire home or help offset the high cost of electric or gas heat, consideration for children in the home must be a top priority.

A fence either purchased or custom built, must be installed around the wood stove if young children are present. Crawling infants and toddlers are most at risk as they are too young to understand the dangers of a wood stove and the word 'no' is simply not enough.

The enclosure must be tall enough that only an adult can step over it. It must also be made of materials that cannot be climbed on. Vertical rails or fine mesh can keep a child from climbing over the fence. The enclosure should also be placed far enough from the wood stove that a reaching child cannot touch the surfaces of the stove.

Even with a fence installed, a crawling child or toddler should never be left alone unsupervised in a room with a wood stove burning. Toddlers, especially, like to toss items over the fence. Heavier objects such as blocks could easily crack or break the glass front of certain models of stoves. Plastic items, should they reach the top of the stove could easily melt and release toxic fumes into the area.

From an early age, children should be taught the dangers of a wood stove. It should be explained that fire is indeed hot and should not be played with in any form. The same explanations given to children about the kitchen cook stove and safety should apply to a wood stove heater.

Children are fascinated with fire. As you are loading a wood stove with either logs or pellets, this becomes a perfect time to discuss with them the dangers. You don't want a child to be terrified of the wood stove, but at the same time you do want to instill a healthy respect for the appliance.

Older children can help with wood stove chores, such as bringing in firewood or pellets. They can also help sweep up the area or engage younger children while the parent is occupied with the stove. Other chores, such as loading the stove or emptying the ash pan is best left to older teenagers or adults.

Another concern with wood stoves, not just for children, is the pollutants put into the indoor air by the stove. If a child has an allergy to smoke or asthma, a wood stove could make an attack more likely. Care should be taken that such a child is out of the room when the stove is opened for filling or for cleaning the ash pan.

Before purchasing any wood stove, make sure that the stove is EPA approved. Do not take the salesman's word for this; ask to see a demonstration model that includes the EPA sticker. The EPA has stringent requirements for wood stoves that will help keep indoor pollutants to a minimum.

The disposal of the contents of the ash pan is another concern when children are present. Ashes should not be dumped in any area where children are likely to play, as there could be hot embers alive in the ashes. A better solution is to dump the ashes into an ash bucket and allow it to sit twenty four hours or at least overnight. Ash buckets should be kept within the confines of the fence until totally cold.

Firewood or pellets should also be kept within the fenced enclosure. Any wood chips or pellets that have fallen outside the fence should be swept up immediately if young children are in the home. Both chips and pellets pose a choking hazard for children who put either into their mouths.

A pot of water should be kept on the wood stove when the stove is in use. Wood heat is a very dry heat and the water will help keep the air moist. This is especially important to help keep children's skin from drying out during the heating season. Infants are more at risk, but children and adults of any age can be affected by the drier air of a wood heated home.

The use of precautions and safety measures can make children and wood stoves a happy mix. For centuries, children were raised in homes with either a wood stove or an open fireplace. With diligence and supervision, any home can be heated with wood and still have happy, healthy children.

Sometimes it can seem as though stay at home moms and working moms are battling against each other. The truth is, there are lots of women who stay at home with their children, and there are some moms who work. The other truth is, one of them is not better than the other. As moms, we all love our children, and we all want them to be happy. There are many advantages and disadvantages to both staying at home, and working outside of the home.

Staying at home with your children is great because you are able to be with them all day. You are able to bond more with your children, and instill more of your values and what you feel is important into your children. It also gives you a great feeling to be able to be with your children all the time. However, staying home with your children can also make them more dependent on you than most other children are toward their moms. It can make them fear leaving you, whether you're leaving them at school, or with the babysitter for a night off. The disadvantages to you are being on call all the time. It can make you feel like you want to tear your hair out! Also, although you have one of the hardest jobs, you're not actually bringing in an income. Although, today many moms are working over the internet, or with home businesses.

Mothers who work outside the home get their chance to be someone else other than 'mom.' They can concentrate on what they are trying to do much better than a mother who works at home. The only 'kids' they have in their hair are the ones they work with! Also, being away from your children more will foster a greater sense of independence in them. Disadvantages to working outside the home are obvious. You don't get as much time to spend with your children, and this can make you feel guilty or neglectful. Also, you have to know that whoever may be your children's caretakers will have an impact on what your children grow to believe.

Whether we work outside the home, or stay at home with our kids, we are all mothers. We all want the same things for our children. Happiness, opportunities, and we want to give them all we can. Being a mother is hard enough today. We need to stick together as moms, whatever kind of mom we are. Supporting each other in motherhood and in life is what is important. Support each other's decisions and be proud of the decision that you have made. Let's end the war!

by: L. J. Allen

Each time our children graduate from one stage to another (i.e. crawling - walking, preschool - school, highschool - graduation) we as parents are excited and a little sad as well. We want our children to grow up, but we reminisce about the "good old" days. I think those mixed feelings are normal for all of us. My question for you is - "Are your children growing up too fast emotionally and socially?" We can't stop their physical growth, but we can effect their emotional and social growth.

Our society is compressing childhood more and more to where children are not children for very long. We only have 18 years in our entire life to be children. We struggle as parents to keep our children innocent. Unfortunately, the events of September 11th stole away even more of our children's innocence.

Children are not little adults. Often, children dress like adults in miniature. Children want to emulate their teen or adult heroes in dress and talk. As parents we are fighting a raging river in keeping our children young and innocent. Society, schools, and parents are pushing children to grow up too fast.

Answer the following questions to see if your children are growing up too fast?

1. Do your children want to wear clothing that is designed for much older children?
2. Do your younger children want to watch TV shows designed for teenagers? Do your teenagers want to watch adult TV shows that contain sex and violence?
3. Are the books your children are reading age appropriate?
4. Are your children involved in so many extra-curricular activities they have no down time to just explore or goof off?
5. Are your children losing that wonderful "childish" sense of wonder about the world or do they know it all?
6. Do your find your children are growing increasingly inpatient and have to be entertained? Do they often say I'm bored?
7. Can you remember the last time you told your child you are not old enough to know about a certain topic and we will talk about it when you get older?
8. When was the last time you told your children, "No, you can't do that until your older or that outfit is not acceptable to wear in our family?"
9. Do you monitor what music your children listen to, computer games they play, Internet sites they visit - are they age appropriate?
10. Do your children hang out with much older kids who are not a good influence?

Hopefully, these questions have caused you to stop and think about how quickly your children are growing up. Due to society's pressures you will have to make a concerted effort to keep your children innocent. There will be parent and child peer pressure to force your children to do things early. You may not be a popular parent when you say No to something "everyone else is doing." Parenting is not for the fainthearted or a popularity contest.

In closing, let me relate a recent example. I was watching a morning news shoe and they were discussing summer camps for kids. The guest said more and more kids are looking for computer and science camps, in order to improve their resumes for college. I found myself yelling at the TV - "Why can't you just enjoy camp, instead of it looking good on a resume. When did camp stop being fun and started being work?"
Remember the wise words of King Solomon in Ecclesiastes 3:1 - "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven." Childhood is a precious time and it is all ready much too short, keep your children innocent and protect their childhood.

By: Kimberly Chastain, MS, LMFT

Tips to help you and your children move towards Simple and Organized Living!

1. Outdoor Toys - Organize outside toys by keeping a large plastic tub or crate on the porch/deck or in the garage. Go through and throw away toys that are broken and give away or sell toys that have been outgrown or are no longer in use.

2. Snacks - Keep children's dishes and snacks on low shelves so they can access them.

3. Baskets - Keep baskets or crates for toys in each room to avoid scattered toys everywhere.

4. Videos - Label all video movies and turn them so that kids can easily find the movie they are looking for. Go through and do away with those that you no longer watch.

5. Make a Sandwich Center - Simply put lunch meat, pre-sliced tomatoes, lettuce and what ever else your children eat on sandwiches in a plastic container and label it "Sandwich Center" and teach them to make their own sandwich. All they have to do is open the fridge and grab the "Sandwich Center" which contains everything they need to put the sandwich together and return the container to the fridge when finished.

6. Chore Time - Give children appropriate chores for their ages. It is so easy for us as parents to do it ourselves to save time and arguments but this is not doing our children any good in the long run. Give them a choice of chores, trade chores among each other in order to combat boredom make it a fun process and they will want to do the chores. When they do a good job let them know and likewise if they do a bad job because they are in a hurry let them know that also and have them do it better next time.

7. The Night Before - A great way to relieve morning stress is to do what you can the night before. Children can take a bath, lay their clothes out for the next day, have parents sign notes, get their backpacks, jackets and books together and have ready at an accessible place.

8. Donate Toys - Have children go through toys and donate them or help them have a yard sale and earn extra money.

9. Pick Up Time - Have kids use 5 - 10 minutes daily to pick up their room and this will save alot of time when room cleaning day rolls around because they have stayed somewhat ahead of the mess.

10. Backpacks - Have kids clean out their backpacks and launder or wipe them clean once a week. Throw away all papers that are no longer any good and only return the items needed for the week or next day.

By: Angela Billings

The other day, when I went shopping for groceries, I was asked to pay for the plastic bags used to carry my purchases. I was appalled. That happened to be bring your own bag day. Many customers walked off in a huff that day. We tend to take for granted the plastic bags stores usually give their customers for free.

On hindsight, the stores which tried to get customers to bring their own bags rather than use the stores plastic bags were doing the environment a favor. Even if it meant offending their customers.

Plastic bags are among the modern conveniences that are insidiously destroying our world. They use up the earth's precious resources, kill the wildlife and pollute our world.

1. Plastic bags require petroleum to produce.

We are already short of petrol. Mankind has been draining off the earth's precious resource to its breaking point. Petroleum is critical for our modern life. Petrol is needed for energy. Computers, lighting, heating, transport, factories... the world as we know it today will grind to a halt if our supply of petroleum is turned off. Why are we wasting this precious resource by making plastic bags?

2. At least 100,000 animals like penguins, whales, turtles and dolphins die each year because of plastic bags.

Many animals mistake plastic bags for food and die as they ingest these bags. After the the animal dies and decomposes, the plastic bag stays intact. It litters the landscape and awaits its next victim.
Plastic bags kill wildlife. That would further upset the balance of nature.

3. Plastic bags form 20% of the litter found on beaches.

Besides killing wildlife and wasting petrol, plastic bags destroy the natural beauty of our world's beaches. Imagine going to your favorite beach. Once, it was unspoiled. You could clear blue sea for miles out there. The sand was white, or like gold in the sun. Birds were flying around. Now, you see litter everywhere. Thanks to inconsiderate humans who dump there cans and plastic bags all over the coastline.

4. In USA alone, 100 billion plastic bags are used every year. How about China, India, Europe and the rest of the world. The numbers are staggering.

5. The problem doesn't end here. These billions of bags are not bio-degradable. It takes 1000 years before a plastic bag starts to decompose. That compounds the problem drastically.

So what can you do about it?

We have become so dependent on these convenient one-use bags it is hard to imagine life without them.

Let's start with baby steps.

Get a tote bag like one of these at http://www.bagsmall.com/tote-bags.htm to hold your shopping. Tell the cashier to keep the bags and put your purchases directly in your tote instead. Keep your receipt carefully as proof of your purchase.

Recycle your existing plastic bags. You can use them to hold the garbage instead of buying additional garbage bags.

I'm sure you can think of other ways to reduce your use of plastic bags. A little effort will go a long way.

By: Janice Tham

Many of us make New Year’s resolutions every year. We set goals for exercising, loosing weight, staying organized. But how many of us take the time to size up our family?

Are you conscious of how your time is spent together? How many meals are you eating together as a family? How much time do you spend alone with your spouse? Do your children’s activities flood your calendar?

In just a minute, I’m going to give you suggestions for five basic building blocks that help strengthen families, but first I’d like to suggest that you do a simple exercise. Take out your calendar from last month. Calculate how much time you spent with the following activities: time spent all together as a family; time spent alone with each child; time spent alone with your spouse; time for yourself; and work time. What did you find out? Review the suggestions below and see if you want to incorporate some of these ideas.

Strategy #1: Commit to eating four or more evening meals together as a family.

The family meal, once a common occurrence in American homes, has now been usurped by activity after activity. It’s estimated that only 30 percent of us eat meals together regularly. Yet, all research points to the fact that the family meal is a relic worth saving.

A University of Michigan study found that more meals at home was the single strongest predictor of better achievement scores and fewer behavioral problems. Meal time was far more powerful than time spent in school, studying, church, playing sports and art activities.(1)

Choose activities for your child that don’t commonly interrupt dinner time or be creative about how you can still eat together.

Strategy #2: Schedule a minimum of 2 hours a week together with your spouse.

Married couples spend, on average, just four minutes a day in meaningful conversation. (Source: American Demographics) The number one activity that spouses do together is watch TV. We seem to take for granted that our relationship with our spouse can go on auto-pilot, without care or nurturing. But yet without a strong marital foundation, the whole family system can fall apart.

One suggestion is to set aside 10 minutes a day to talk one-on-one with your spouse, uninterrupted. Wait until the children go to bed or set a boundary with them that Mom and Dad get 10 minutes alone after dinner each night to connect. You’ll gain an hour more of together time each week by this simple practice!

Consider having an in-house “date.” Stay up late and have dinner together after the kids are in bed. Build a fire and share some appetizers. Play a game together.

And of course, try to have a “real” date that generates some excitement a few times a month. You need a break from your kids and you deserve time for fun, too!

Strategy #3: Schedule a minimum of one family activity together each week.

We make decisions every day about how to spend our time. Nothing can be more important than the time you spend connecting as a family. While dealing with the hectic pace of work and children’s activities, the promise of family time on the calendar can be very welcoming.

Try to schedule at least one hour-long family activity each week. Write it down in INK on the calendar.

The activities can be as simple as playing games together, doing a puzzle, playing tennis, or watching family videos. Come up with a list of fun activities with your family and get started!

Strategy #4: Schedule a minimum of 30 minutes per week of special one-on-one time together with each child.

This is the most concrete thing that you can do to deepen your attachment to your child.

A child is far more likely to reveal intimate feelings to you when you’re alone with them. It’s highly unlikely that a child, who may be feeling vulnerable already, will reveal perceived weaknesses in front of a sibling. But, given time to let down their guard with a parent, they may let you in on struggles they wouldn’t reveal at the dinner table.

By having your sole attention, the child will feel valued. You’re making a huge statement to the child that nothing else is more important to you.

If you’re lucky enough to have two parents in the home, you can always try rotating the special time so that each child gets time with each parent.

Strategy #5: Have your child involved in no more than one or two activities simultaneously.

If your child is in an activity, it means that you’re in the activity, driving the child and siblings around to get to practices and games. Activities are fine, and even beneficial, in small doses, but activities rob time from you as a family. No factor is more important in a child’s development than time spent with their family.

The number of hours that children spend in structured sports has doubled. The number of hours a week that children passively watch a sibling’s activities has increased five fold to over three hours per week. And the amount of free time that children have has decreased by 12 hours per week. (1)

Be conscious of whether your life feels out of balance and set some rules about the number of activities your child can be involved in.

(1. University of Michigan’s Institute for Social Research, Center Survey, January, 1999. Reported by Sandra L. Hofferth, “Changes in American Children’s Time, 1981-1997.”)  By : Toni Schutta,