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You can't make this stuff up. Ignorant school officials in Fulton, Mississippi conspired to discriminate against Constance McMillen by sending her to a fake prom while the heterosexual kids partied at the real prom. What part of lawsuit do these a-holes not understand?

McMillen tells The Advocate that a parent-organized prom happened behind her back — she and her date were sent to a Friday night event at a country club in Fulton, Miss., that attracted only five other students. Her school principal and teachers served as chaperones, but clearly there wasn't much to keep an eye on.

"They had two proms and I was only invited to one of them," McMillen says. "The one that I went to had seven people there, and everyone went to the other one I wasn’t invited to."

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David Shuster is being punished by MSNBC, again. This time Shuster didn't get caught calling anybody a pimp or a whore. This time Shuster cheated on MSNBC by shooting a secret pilot for CNN. Things are not looking good for the poor jerk. Reportedly, MSNBC President Phil Griffin "ripped Shuster a new one over the phone" and will do it again in the office. MSNBC could only improve by dumping Shuster.

Shuster won't be on the air today for his 10 a.m. and 3 p.m. shows, according to MSNBC insiders. Whether he returns before his contract expires in December is up for debate. . In the past, MSNBC reps have been downright temperate in their official reactions to Shuster's mishaps. This time, however, they've taken a giant step - for MSNBC, anyway -- beyond temperate. If Shuster is guilty, he will "be punished appropriately."

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People in Republican areas, like Texas, are not mailing in their census forms. I think we can thank Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-MN) and her fellow conspiracy theorists for demonizing the census as an Unconstitutional Evil Socialist Big Government Plot to take away guns and lock up right-wingers in Japanese internment camps. Or something like that.

This is so funny. Tiger Woods reportedly lives in fear of his former mistresses. Woods has hired 90 bodyguards to protect him from his 2 dozen mistresses while he plays golf at the Masters Golf Tournament. That's almost 4 bodyguards per mistress!

A virtual army of private bodyguards - about 90 in all - will be protecting Tiger Woods when he returns to golf this week at the Masters, London's Sunday Mail reported Saturday. Woods' vast security detail will include former FBI and Secret Service agents, as well as armed deputies - all of whom are believed to have received photos of the golf great's sexual conquests.

The world's best-known philanderer reportedly fears a confrontation with one of his more than two dozen alleged mistresses. "None of these girls are allowed anywhere near him," a security guard told the Sunday Mail. "If one photo comes out of a beautiful lady touching him, it would be a disaster. . Eight guards will be surrounding Woods "as a last line of defense," the paper says.

BREAKING NEWS: Tiger At Masters - Without Elin

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