All About Women | Women

You can’t throw a rock in any metropolis on Earth without hitting someone claiming to be a manager. Where musicians go, managers follow. It’s as accepted and expected in the entertainment industry as an out-of-control cocaine habit or a failure to pay taxes. When you tell people you’re a musician, one of the first things they’re going to ask you is: Do you have a manager? However, those in the throws of the music business know to ask an even more accurate question: Do you have a good manager?

“What’s the difference?” you may ask. Isn’t any manager better than no manager at all? While it would seem that the answer to that question is unequivocally, “Yes”, in reality it’s a bit like asking, “Isn’t having a herpes-ridden prostitute for a girlfriend better than being single?” In truth, bad representation is far worse than a lack of representation. While, it’s a fact, that there are things your band will probably never achieve without the aid of a manager, agent, entertainment attorney, etc., bad representation can stagnate a career…stop it dead in its hurling climb to the ranks of superstardom or even worse…undo some of the hard work the band has already done.

Sad but true, a bad manager can take a perfectly good band and turn them into a thing so foul that old gypsy women covering their faces with rags will spit and give your band the evil eye as you pass. Ok, that may be a bit dramatic, but seriously…all your band really has is its name and its reputation, so why would take a chance on either of those by putting the whole of your band into the hands of someone that you’re not 100% sure has your best interests at stake?

The following are a few tips that will help you to decipher whether or not your manager can take you to the top or turn your band into a flop:

   1. The Drummer’s Girlfriend Is Not A Manager---Sure, she may get names for your mailing list, invite her girl’s beach volleyball team to all of your gigs and post your latest pictures on your website photo gallery, but she’s not really your manager. She’s a helper, she can be the president of your fan club, the head of your street team and the world’s sexiest roadie but she probably doesn’t know how to put together a press package and make the calls that will get you into an A&R rep’s office for a meeting. This also applies to: boyfriends, wives, husbands, booty calls, one night stands, moms, dads, cousins, aunts, uncles, neighbors, nieces, nephews, grandparents, grandchildren, pets and the homeless guy who roots through your trash at midnight. These people may all be well-meaning and you can accept their aid in dozens of ways (it takes a village to build a popular unsigned band) but don’t give them the label or the powers of a manager.

   2. Treasure Your Fans But Don’t Let Them Manage You---This should be a given but you’d be surprised how many over-eager, slightly-obsessed fans move from semi-stalker to mega-manager in a few simple weeks. I cannot stress how simply wrong this entire concept is for two dozen major reasons the most important of which is: fans need to be kept at a distance. There is a reason why that same person comes to all of your shows no matter how many you play, gets there early, sits up front seemingly paralyzed starring at you enraptured. Either they’re in love with someone in the band or they’re insane. These may be reasons to get a restraining order but certainly not reasons to make someone your manager. A band’s manager knows every secret of each musician, every person in each member’s personal life, where you keep your money, where you live, and who’s in your fan/contact database. This is not information that you want someone who has 450 cut-out pictures of you on their bedroom ceiling having at his/her disposal. Enough said?

   3. Don’t Sign A Contract Unless It’s Worth It---Manager’s like control. That why they choose to be managers and not people who macramé wall hangings with the mane hair of ponies. Thus, most managers will try and evoke you into signing a contract. In the entertainment industry, contracts are like marriage certificates…before you sign one be sure your band wants to be tied to the same person for long time (a year, two years, five years, etc.) because they’re much easier to get into than to get out of. For example, if you sign a contract with an efficient, but somewhat green manager, who is helping all he/she can to get you everything possible from what little resources he/she has and then Gwen Stefani’s management team approaches you after a big gig and wants to put you on tour with John Mayer. Do you think if you tell them, “We love to take your tour but we’re under contract with someone else for the next five years, can you hit us up then?” the offer will still stand? Not so much. So, if you must sign contracts, keep them short and make sure they give you room to act, think, play and communicate with others without getting clearance from your band warden (manager). And make it includes an exit clause. Read up on it.

   4. Sometimes Bigger Is Not Better---Although it’s a huge ego stroke to brag to all of the other musicians backstage at the Whiskey A Go-Go that your manager works with Grammy award-winners and stadium sell-outs, sometimes an unsigned band can get lost in a huge management firm. While Mr. Big Stud Manager is busy picking out Madonna’s dress for the American Music Awards, he may forget to ask Quincy Jones to attend your bass player’s birthday gig at Billy-Bob Wang’s Tofu BBQ Shack. The problem with huge managers is that their focus often goes the acts that are making them 15% of 100 million dollars a year. Your 15% of $45.75 a year after expenses is probably not his highest priority now or ever, and what good are his super amazing industry contacts if he never remembers to invite them to your gigs?

      Having a manager is great but only if they provide more benefit to the band than the sum total of your band members and band helpers can do for yourselves. If you find someone who can open doors, take your music places it cannot go on its on and has your best intentions at heart, then grab that contract, sign it and enjoy the benefits. If not, you may find yourself: conned, stalked, ignored and/or legally bound to someone that puts their own agenda (well-meaning or otherwise) and their own ego above what’s right for you band. And whatever you do, don’t sit around waiting for Mr./Ms. Right to wisk your band off its feet and carry it off on his/her white horse to the Fairyland where everyone gets a record deal. You, as its members, know more than anyone, how to do what’s right for your band and nothing will attract the perfect manager faster than seeing musicians who are out there, doing their thing, and making headway in a very difficult business with a great attitude and terrific music.   By : Sheena Metal

1. Instead of floral centerpieces think about candles or colored stones. Line the bottom of a vase with colored stones. Set a candle or a few stems of your favorite flower (most likely this will be the flower chosen as your theme in your bridal bouquets). One bride used her centerpiece as wedding favors. She planted a flower, in this case a daffodil, each in a pot and put them in the center of the table. It not only made a beautiful centerpiece but each guest took home a lovely plant to remember the joyous occasion.

2. Afternoon weddings, Sunday mornings, or Fridays are not premium times and therefore you can get a break on the prices. Brides and Grooms are now thinking outside the box. Garden weddings or Brunch style weddings are very sophisticated and can be very entertaining. This also allows time for the happy couple to unwind before taking off for their honeymoon or spending quality time with close friends and family after the party.

3. Take some time to educate yourself on flowers. Flowers that are out of season or a special color are more expensive. Talk with your floral designer and ask what flowers are in season in your color scheme. There is so much out there to choose from without costing much.

4. Consider making your own favors. Favors are not meant to be expensive. They are a token of gratitude for your guest. Packets of seeds attached to a note of thanks or a special poem or saying goes a long way.

5. Alcohol can be very expensive and a cash bar is out of the question. Depending on your guest, wine can be served during dinner by the wait staff while beer and soft drinks can be available at the bar. This can keep your bar expense under control.

Planning a wedding is exciting and fun as well as a lot of work. In order to stay within budget keep all receipts and make sure you know how your money is being spent. Be flexible and think outside the box. Remember skimp in some places, so that you can splurge in others and things will turn out great!  By : Yasmin Shikina

Love is a single word but it carries many deep feelings within itself. These are care, understanding, devotion, dedication, respect for each other, and sense of responsibility thereby making this feeling so powerful and incredible. The feeling of love comes instantly in a person’s heart and it has the power to merge an individual within itself. Love: a four letter word which fills everybody’s heart with smile, happiness and joy. It is a delicate thread which binds two people in such a strong relation. It makes life so beautiful.

Everything around you seems to blossom. Love brings meaning to ones life. It makes you feel special in its own way. You just can’t stop thinking about your beloved. When you are in love you can never be lonely wherever you go. Love is when you want to be with your soul mate every time and everywhere. Love makes each day worth getting up for. It’s magic! It can do wonders. It is the feeling of heart not mind.

You don't have to go overboard by going to a fancy restaurant every other day or going on vacations that you cannot afford. Mind you those things help but, sometimes the little things that mean the most. Here are five things you can do that will improve your relationship and will allow you to have the best love making experience:

1. Listening

The lack of communication can be very frustrating to women but not listening can really get their dander up. Many men have been accused of concentrating more on whatever was on television than our wives and girlfriends. To a large degree it's true. Most women like to talk about personal matters that have a direct bearing on their lives, their family or friends. What's on TV at that time is irrelevant. Show that you appreciate her by listening. Don't just wait for her to start talking. Initiate the conversation sometimes, and then listen carefully not only to what she says but her body language as well. This is not a one shot deal. Listening to her on a steady basis can only help better your relationship.

2. The Small Occasion Celebration

We've all seen the shows where the woman gets upset because the husband forgets their anniversary or birthday. That quite honestly should never happen. However for a lot of women, there are many smaller occasions that mean just as much; for instance the anniversary of your first date or the day both of you bought something together.

Being able to surprise your lady with little things that you know mean something to her (something she probably figured you took no notice of) can be a major relationship booster. If you have to "cheat" a little bit then get your own personal journal to keep track of these things.

3. Get to Know her People

Women value their relationships. While many men are of the take it or leave it mentality, it is very important to most women that you get to know her family and friends. These are people who make up a special part of her life and by taking the energy and effort to genuinely get to know them, you are showing her how much you love and care for her.

They maybe coming from a perspective that you are not crazy about but hang in there. Be open minded and respectful. The chances are that somewhere down the line you will want her to meet your people. Extend the same courtesies to her family and friends that you would expect from her if the situations were reversed.

It's easy to get stuck in a routine and set in our ways. But it's most important to continually show the lady of your life that you love her. Again it doesn't take extravagance. Get to know her people, be mindful of the small big occasions and above all listen. Doing these three things is planting the seeds of long term healthy relationship.

4. Give Up Trying to Change the Other Person

The desire to fix or change the other person is one of the biggest mistakes you can make. Plus, it causes power struggles within relationships and issues of control. One person feels she cannot love the other unless the other changes. The other feels hurt, inadequate and as though something is wrong with him.

Having a healthy relationship means having the ability to love your partner as they are. Our partners have been put here to grow, develop and discover who they are. This can be a lengthy and challenging process. But the surprising thing about change is that the less we push and disapprove of others, the more easily and naturally they grow and change.

5. Develop Patience

Patience is an old-fashioned word in today's world. However, there is no way to rush growth in relationships or in the development of joy. If you're eager to get on the right track, there are two ways to get started: Learn how to be more giving and make an effort to be a better listener. But each one of these tasks takes time to master -- and patience. That's why it is necessary to realize that as we are, right now at this moment, we are lovable and acceptable. If you're ready to increase the amount of joy you feel in your own relationship, take back the responsibility for finding joy in your life, you will be pleased at the results.  By : Kayla Lane-Moore

Many television shows that bulding a home by team of builders and designers in seven days while the family goes off on vacation. It is a spinoff of Extreme Makeover. The show's are top-rated and has become more popular than the original Extreme Makeover. Normally family will then be sent off on a one-week vacation ,while the house is renovated or demolished, depending on its condition and the family's needs. Beginning with Season 3 the demolitions have become quite creative -- the team has used falling trees, tanks, and even monster trucks to accomplish the task where needed.A local home builder and community volunteers begin basic work (electrical, plumbing, roofing, and if the house is demolished framing a new one) while the design team begins designing the creative aspects of the house. Once the basic work is completed, the design team then will add the finishing touches. Shows often feature design team members making a trip to a local Sears store as well as special guest appearances.At the end of the week, the family returns to their home, to see cheering crowds and the view of their home blocked by a bus.

Television makes everything look so easy and that may be one of the problems with it. Home renovations are not easy to do right and the home renovations television shows can make you think that home renovations are so simple to do but what they neglect to remind you is that there are experts doing those home renovations or at least supervising them. There is a lot involved in home renovations but I will admit that those television shows certainly do offer a lot of great ideas and they offer ideas that I have used in my own home but I do have to remind myself that experts are doing the work. Unfortunately the work I do can remind me that there are experts doing that work on television.

The home renovations television shows are amazing because they take homes that look like they should be demolished and turn them into palaces. The newest craze in home renovations television shows are shows about flipping houses. Flipping a house means buying a house in need of repair for a low price, putting in some work to it, and then selling the house for a profit. The danger I noticed in these shows is that they make house flipping look really easy and it is not. As an answer to that very problem the newer house flipping shows show the actual results of the flip and not just the results the flipper was expecting. More often than not the profit they were hoping for is nowhere near the profit they actually make.

Television shows can make replacing walls look so easy that it is almost dangerous. In a half hour show the walls in a home are taken down and then rebuilt with what looks like no problem at all. I often wonder how many times a wife has come home from work to see that her husband had watched a home renovation show that made replacing walls look so easy and now they are the proud owners of a huge mess. One thing those television shows neglect to cover is the concept of load bearing walls and how removing a load bearing wall can cause parts of your house to collapse. I bet that is a fun lesson to learn. So just be careful when you watch some of these television shows and remember that the ones that make it look easy are professionals. Unless you are a professional you are not going to experience the same sense of ease that the professionals on television experienced.  By : Roger Thompson

Many of us make New Year’s resolutions every year. We set goals for exercising, loosing weight, staying organized. But how many of us take the time to size up our family?

Are you conscious of how your time is spent together? How many meals are you eating together as a family? How much time do you spend alone with your spouse? Do your children’s activities flood your calendar?

In just a minute, I’m going to give you suggestions for five basic building blocks that help strengthen families, but first I’d like to suggest that you do a simple exercise. Take out your calendar from last month. Calculate how much time you spent with the following activities: time spent all together as a family; time spent alone with each child; time spent alone with your spouse; time for yourself; and work time. What did you find out? Review the suggestions below and see if you want to incorporate some of these ideas.

Strategy #1: Commit to eating four or more evening meals together as a family.

The family meal, once a common occurrence in American homes, has now been usurped by activity after activity. It’s estimated that only 30 percent of us eat meals together regularly. Yet, all research points to the fact that the family meal is a relic worth saving.

A University of Michigan study found that more meals at home was the single strongest predictor of better achievement scores and fewer behavioral problems. Meal time was far more powerful than time spent in school, studying, church, playing sports and art activities.(1)

Choose activities for your child that don’t commonly interrupt dinner time or be creative about how you can still eat together.

Strategy #2: Schedule a minimum of 2 hours a week together with your spouse.

Married couples spend, on average, just four minutes a day in meaningful conversation. (Source: American Demographics) The number one activity that spouses do together is watch TV. We seem to take for granted that our relationship with our spouse can go on auto-pilot, without care or nurturing. But yet without a strong marital foundation, the whole family system can fall apart.

One suggestion is to set aside 10 minutes a day to talk one-on-one with your spouse, uninterrupted. Wait until the children go to bed or set a boundary with them that Mom and Dad get 10 minutes alone after dinner each night to connect. You’ll gain an hour more of together time each week by this simple practice!

Consider having an in-house “date.” Stay up late and have dinner together after the kids are in bed. Build a fire and share some appetizers. Play a game together.

And of course, try to have a “real” date that generates some excitement a few times a month. You need a break from your kids and you deserve time for fun, too!

Strategy #3: Schedule a minimum of one family activity together each week.

We make decisions every day about how to spend our time. Nothing can be more important than the time you spend connecting as a family. While dealing with the hectic pace of work and children’s activities, the promise of family time on the calendar can be very welcoming.

Try to schedule at least one hour-long family activity each week. Write it down in INK on the calendar.

The activities can be as simple as playing games together, doing a puzzle, playing tennis, or watching family videos. Come up with a list of fun activities with your family and get started!

Strategy #4: Schedule a minimum of 30 minutes per week of special one-on-one time together with each child.

This is the most concrete thing that you can do to deepen your attachment to your child.

A child is far more likely to reveal intimate feelings to you when you’re alone with them. It’s highly unlikely that a child, who may be feeling vulnerable already, will reveal perceived weaknesses in front of a sibling. But, given time to let down their guard with a parent, they may let you in on struggles they wouldn’t reveal at the dinner table.

By having your sole attention, the child will feel valued. You’re making a huge statement to the child that nothing else is more important to you.

If you’re lucky enough to have two parents in the home, you can always try rotating the special time so that each child gets time with each parent.

Strategy #5: Have your child involved in no more than one or two activities simultaneously.

If your child is in an activity, it means that you’re in the activity, driving the child and siblings around to get to practices and games. Activities are fine, and even beneficial, in small doses, but activities rob time from you as a family. No factor is more important in a child’s development than time spent with their family.

The number of hours that children spend in structured sports has doubled. The number of hours a week that children passively watch a sibling’s activities has increased five fold to over three hours per week. And the amount of free time that children have has decreased by 12 hours per week. (1)

Be conscious of whether your life feels out of balance and set some rules about the number of activities your child can be involved in.

(1. University of Michigan’s Institute for Social Research, Center Survey, January, 1999. Reported by Sandra L. Hofferth, “Changes in American Children’s Time, 1981-1997.”)  By : Toni Schutta,